Saturday, August 12, 2006

You know what I just realized???? I have not really been saying the nice things about my husband, just the bad. I do not want to give the impression that he was the only one at fault in this marriage. It was me too, but just like my sis-in-law says....."You don't fix problems in one marriage by another marriage." I love my husband very much. He has his faults, but his strengths outweigh his weaknesses. He is good to me and is fair to both me and Lisa (sometimes too fair ; ) ), but I guess that is his duty as a Muslim. He is as fair as he can be, but she is the one who gave up her rights to maintenance so he insha Allah won't be accountable for that, but I know that if he could afford to maintain her then he would. Anyways I wanted to make sure that it is known that my husband is a good man and is wonderful to me majority of the time, but their is a part of me that is ungratful because of the hurt. I know I need to get over this. He is stressed and a bit overwhelmed with his work situation so that's why he hasn't been himself lately. One way for us women to feel grateful in our situations, I believe, is to follow the Sunnah and always compare our lives to those who have less than us and then our situations will seem petty. I wish I can always keep this in mind for myself and then ALHAMDULILLAH will be in my head, on my tounge, and in my heart.

4 comments:

Safa said...

Look sweetie, I want you to remember this....

There are three ways of rejecting evil....
*with ur hands
*with ur tongue
*with ur heart...(this is the lowest)

If ever your hubby calls you to account for anything, remember this.....as long as ur heart realizes that some of ur behaviour is wrong....u are still in the good, u with me??

We all tend to rant and rave about hubbies in our blogs, it's our free venting space. I'm sure that he must have been a great hubby, to open his home to this woman when she had no one but you. Not many men would allow that....stop thinking about her.....if she's double crossed you, thats for her to answer...nothing that you do at this point will make you feel better about the past...just move on with life...and focus on HUBBY and KIDS....come on Vena.....u can do it!!

Vena said...

Insha Allah I will try. The problem is that everytime I get myself pumped to be a good wife and he and I are happy then something happens to provoke me. That's why I say shaytan is always on my back and he won't stop till we divorce, but insha Allah I will be stronger than that. I have to boost my eman and focus on the deen. Once Allah loves me then my husband will insha Allah see me in a new bright light. May Allah make this test easy and guide us to what is right and place mercy and tranquility within our marriage.

Safa said...

ameen.....

Aneesa Lewis said...

indeed the more we strive to practice the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam, and among his Sunnah is polygyny, the harder shaytan will try to rock our solid foundation. we must never forget that shaytan made a promise that he will stop at nothing to lead the servants of Allah astray. anytime i find myself thinking crazy thoughts or i feel my jealousy overcoming me, i think about shaytan's promise and then i pull myself together. i will not let that little devil or his posse win!!!