Tuesday, June 24, 2008
So it's finally happened!!! We are officially separated. He spoke with the sheikh and my mother and they both sided with me on the issues I had addressed concern with. He didn't like that of course, but the sheikh still advised him to separate from me until we decide if divorce is really what I want. He doesn't want a divorce or a separation, but then again why would he? He has a place to escape to every other day. He has a spouse to comfort him every other day. Why would he have to leave? He gets the best of both worlds. It's so convenient isn't it. Well that is over with now. I am not going to be here to accommodate him. He comes home lights a fire in me and then leaves. Sometimes I could swear that he would only come home to provoke me. That is not a life or a marriage. We were not like that. I no longer know the person he has become and I deeply miss the person that he was, but I am not going to live my life waiting for something that was a part of my past. What's done is done and what's here is here. I just have to accept that as a part of life. Well he tried to act as if nothing happened.....I think he thought I would cool down and forget about it like I always have, but I didn't. Not this time buddy! I am serious. I am sad, but I am determined to stay strong. This is the right thing to do. He has to give me my rights. My kids and I have a right to our time and I refuse to let him take it from us. If that is the case than he will lose his time as well. Insha Allah we will see where all of this leads.